I don't think so....

So, someone tried to bribe me today. They said - “If I give you a gift will you make something happen for me?” Hmmm, no, I’m not related to the godfather and while occasionally I have power to disperse, this obvious bribe made me smile. Was it a life or death thing? No. It was some pissy little thing that required changing a date that could not be changed anyway. What was the bribe – I mean ‘gift’? A whole $50.00. Like super model Linda Evangelista I have a price to get out of bed and $50 ain't gonna do it, sweetie darling.

I have to wonder how successful bribes really are. You give someone $50 to do something for you. The person takes it and does stuff all. In the meantime you’re expecting something to happen for your money and when it doesn’t what come back have you got? The person you bribed is hardly going to admit taking the $50 and you’re just going to look like a nong.

I have been bribed before. I always enjoy it. How people’s minds work fascinates me. Have I ever taken the cash? Oh hell no, I’m expensive to buy.

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