Last Man Standing by Amarinda Jones in Romance

Last Man Standing by Amarinda Jones in Romance

Yes, correct I'm completely out of control with self publishing. I got over my vistaprint addiction and now this is my drug baby....

Amarinda Jones
Penn Halligan
www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book

Back on deck...sorta...

Knock Three Times review

This one has enough twists and turns to please me and any one else I do believe. A woman with a boyfriend, secrets upon secrets, burglars, hot screaming sex, mayhem, and fear, panic and a few frills and dressin's.... throw in some humor and a keen wit and you have a fun read.
Posted by Alternative-Read.com reviewer: WitchGiggles

Back from hospital – gall is bladder gone. Thanks to all the great staff at the Holy Spirit Hospital Northside. And no, being the out and out heathen that I am I did not get struck down by the omnipotent hand from a supposed higher power as I entered the hospital. Either they do not exist or I was too quick for them. Anyway feeling pukeable and I have had to restore every bloody file again on my computer because it chose today to lose it.... so a very short blog tonight as I am sore and now cranky.

'Sick to death of hearing about how many gazillion dollars the Republican Party in the US spent on Sarah Palin’s wardrobe when they could have put that money to good use elsewhere. Shoulders pads do not win elections in the current economic climate. Yeah, the woman intrigues me due to how far she had got and no one seems to know why but I personally would not vote for clothes. I expect she won’t get in as I believe the US wants another Camelot with the nearest thing to JFK they can have with Obama. To be honest, like any political parties they all sound the bloody same to me – be they Aussie or overseas. Let’s get the hoop-la done and move on and solve the problems sans shoulder pads.

LAST MAN STANDING is a thrill ride of adventure that places two very strong and passionate people on a collision course for love. Smart dialogue and ingenious situations will have you riding along with Amy through her mire of emotions. Amy Hart is easily the most likable character in this novel. She has not had the best of experiences where Alex is concerned, yet she takes each new hurdle in stride, unafraid to stick up for herself and willing to stand her ground and to stand behind the man she loves.

Alex is the quintessential tortured hero; his scars and the prophecy that hangs over his head make him the ultimate hero. His responses to Amy and his outward reluctance to embrace his feelings may have been justified, but clearly did not reflect the man within. He has incredible honor and, scared or not, he is absolutely sexy.

LAST MAN STANDING is a wonderful addition to any eBook collection. Nevertheless, I would recommend reading SWIFT OF HEART prior to LAST MAN STANDING, which is also available at Cerridwen Press.
http://romancejunkiesreviews.com/artman/publish/paranormal/Last_Man_Standing.shtml

www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AmarindaJonesNewsletter/Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Quel surprise...

Swift of Heart – Book one – Men of Heart

When Stephanie Hart opens her front door to find long-lost love Mackinley Swift on her doorstep, thoughts of anger, love and an overwhelming urge to slap him and then eat a chocolate bar rush through her mind. Here is the man who taught her to love, to want and to need—then he walked out on her without a word. Now Mac's back telling her he's been away fighting a war in another dimension. Yeah, right, whatever. Stephanie is simply not that stupid.

Mac knows he has the fight of his life on his hands to convince the woman he loves that he had no choice. He did not want to go. Duty to his country called him home but love has brought him back. How hard could it be to convince her that they are meant to be together?

An old enemy is watching the lovers' reunion. He hates Mackinley Swift for killing his brother. He has every intention of making him suffer. The woman Swift loves is the means to do it. Hurt the woman, hurt the man.

I got a nice surprise this morning – well I would have got it a week ago if I had not been a slack arse and checked the other email address I have but I didn’t – anyway I’m in print…well a book is. Amazing Grace. It made me laugh. Yes, that’s right laugh. Why? Because it seems so bizarre to have a book out in print now that I have gotten used to the whole e-book thing. E-books are not big in Australia. But they will be. Anyway…what’s it called? Men of Heart. Why? Long frigging story – I’ll give you the condensed version that does not have me banging my head on the desk trying to think up a title until I had a headache and wondering how did I ever come up with other titles without all the angst. Maybe because those books were planned. This one wasn’t. 'Sort of like the immaculate conception of books if you like.

Men of Heart is a duet book comprising of Swift of Heart and Last Man Standing. I got word that it and another two Ellora’s Cave books – Shades of Gray and Marlow’s Curse (Vampire) would go into print and can I think up a name to call the books? Oh hard…so after much agonizing – which included badgering other people for titles – as a last minute thing I came up with Men of Heart based on the fact that the two stories within were about Stephanie Hart and Amy Hart and well - men. Yes, rocket scientist logic in use there. I had not seen the cover until today so I am pleased as always with what the cover gods at Cerridwen Press created. The title for the vampire one? Yeah, I have given one that has been accepted but until it goes into print, I’ll be schtumm (quiet) on that one.
Reading this blog for the first time and totally confused? I do that to a lot of people. I write under two names – Janet Davies and Amarinda Jones. Janet is mainstream romance and Amarinda is erotica. So two names, two genres – one confusing person and yet I like me…who ever I am. And yes, you can click on the covers to buy.

Last Man Standing – Book 2 Men of Heart

Six months ago, when battle-scarred warrior Alex Navarro jumped into Amy Hart's car, he said he was doing it to save her life. He said a madman from another dimension was after her. But how exactly is trying to seduce her saving her life? Shouldn't Alex be after the bad guy? And why on earth did she give her heart to a man who only wants her for the moment?

Six months later Amy Hart is pregnant, and the father-to-be publicly denies paternity. That's just fine with Amy. She hates Alex Navarro with a passion anyway. And there is no way she is going to change her mind. As for Alex, his deliberate plan for Amy to hate him is backfiring. And that's not his only problem. The threat of an old prophecy hangs over his head. He loves Amy but he will not endanger her. But what choice does he have? Can Alex win back the love of his life and beat the curse that has haunted him for years? Or will greed and jealously win?

Wow what a lot of question marks huh?

The step man cometh back tomorrow. The plan had been to have the front steps finished on Friday but like all good plans that fell to crap so he is here tomorrow morning… at 8am…on a Sunday…when I am traditionally still in my pj’s looking feral. Yes, I will change into something more sedate so as not to tempt the man in wild, lustful temptation with my glamorous pink flannelette bedecked self….it’s the least I can do.

May your Saturday be pleasant and peaceful. For all the latest in romance book news go check out the authors listed in the link below.

www.amarindajones.com
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AmarindaJonesNewsletter/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Peace...

“The more you sweat in peacetime, the less you bleed during war.” --Chinese proverb

Do you think peace is possible? I’m not just talking on a world scale. I am very sceptical that will ever happen anyway. Why? Because there are too many people who think their race, colour, religion and beliefs are better then anyone else’s. I personally don’t care if you are black, white or brindle, who you love or who you worship. You do your thing and I’ll do mine. However cross the line and attack me and mine and I’m not peaceful. But I think most people are like that. When you look at that on a world scale – with so many personalities - then that’s why I am dubious about world peace.

“If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace.” –John Lennon

So, what is peace to you? To me, it’s being free to do as you want without interference by nitwits - because let’s face it, if you are allowed to do your own thing you are happy and generally calm. Peace is being able to come home, shut the door and soak in the quiet of your real life. In my eyes, work is not real life. It is a means to an end. Peace is turning off your email to concentrate on what you are writing. Peace is having a laugh with an old friend because you know each other and you have stopped thinking about trying to change the other years ago. Peace is sitting on my back stairs and having lunch – yes how glamorous – and looking at the trees and the garden and seeing lizards scoot across the grass. Peace is about kicking back and reading a good book. Peace is about walking away from those who annoy the crap out of you – I’m still working on that one.

“Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it” --unknown

Peace comes through many forms…

Upheaval…Last Man Standing by Janet Davies

In the year 2008, two months after of the birth of the son of the scarred warrior, when evil has been thwarted and much blood is shed, the lands of Carronas and Melotia will unite as one. They will become one nation under one name, with one aim—peace.

After great personal upheaval, the brother warriors will lead the way to prosperity and harmony between all. Their children will carry on their legacy. The scarred warrior will never again doubt his way or question his destiny for there is no way it can be stopped. Pain and hatred will be the catalyst for greatness.

His woman will know no peace and there will be nowhere to hide.

The Prophecy of Llewellyn, Seer and Councilor, the Melotian Chronicles 1912


Reality….Kama Sutra Lovers by Anny Cook

Rubbing his forehead, the Chairman muttered, “I thought we left terrorism behind on Earth.”

“Terrorism is a by-product of humans. As long as we have humans around, there will eventually be terrorism, murder, war, violence, or some other type of mayhem. We’re not a very peaceful species,” Lee pointed out. “If we were, I wouldn’t have a job.”


War….Beltaine Bargain by Cindy Spencer Pape

He sighed. He was exhausted. They’d risen well before dawn to be on their way, Huw, in a rush to show off his new spurs to his family, and Rhodri who just ached to be home and at peace. Without the robbers, they would have been in Wales in a day or two, then home to Llyan in just a couple more. Who knew, now, how long it would be before Rhodri felt the comfort of his own castle walls?


Soul….Tempting Tess by Regina Carlysle

Everything she’d done for the past twenty-five years had been careful. Precise. She’d been everything to everyone. Nurturer, lover, supermom. Now it was just her and at forty-five it was time to ponder the great question of her personal universe.

What more was left?

Renting this rustic cabin in the mountains of Ruidoso, New Mexico, was a starting point for what Tess Garrity considered the beginning of her new life. She leaned against the window frame and stared out at nature laid out in all its glory.

Understanding …My Last Dark Day by Barbara Huffert

“Just wanted to prove that I am more than capable of keeping you coming hard for as long as it takes you add someone to your life who understands like we do and knows how to take care of you.” He cupped my cheek gently. “Got it?” I nodded, fighting back my tears. “Aw honey.” He kissed me lightly. “No reason to cry. Not anymore. You’re ours now and all you have to do is remember to come here to us, okay?”

“I will,” I promised without hesitation, stating the truth as it would be for many no-longer-dark days to come.

Yes – by all means click on the covers to buy these bloody good reads.

www.amarindajones.com
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AmarindaJonesNewsletter/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

And if you love him
Oh, be proud of him
Cause after all he's just a man
Stand by your man
Give him two arms to cling to
And something warm to come to
when nights are cold and lonely

Stand by Your Man

I drove to work singing Tammy Wynette songs - primarily - Stand By Your Man - at the top of my lungs. I am an appalling singer but that does not stop me. All week I have been singing along to Pink’s 'get-out-of-my-face-attitude-songs' because it has been a week like that. But today is Friday and it requires more dramatic loud to hell-with-everything-primarily-work songs. I think you'll agree Tammy had some dramatic songs. Dusty Springfield was good at that too. They're farewell, I'll-get-by-without-you-and-the-dog-just-leave-me-the-gin songs. Okay maybe not appropriate for some people but I like my Fridays dramatic because it's the start of the weekend and everything is possible.

I walked into work this morning and people were selling fund raising chocolates. Now I have never been able to walk past a chocolate in my life. It’s a genetic disorder which I have no intention of getting counseling for. I believe the eating of fund raising chockies to be a noble thing to do because the money is going to a good cause and therefore there is no fat transference to the eater of said charity chockie.

“When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.”--Elayne Boosler quotes

So, as per the usual work day, best friend Ethel emailed me from her work place across town. Basically she said “Lucy”- only she calls me that and its started as a code when we were in trouble and it stuck. “Lucy, all men suck and are guided purely by their penises and how can you possibly write about romance when all men are stupid?” Okay then...sounds like her husband…er…Fred…is going to have a tense evening. I personally do not believe all men suck - yes, some do, others blow, while the rest are okay. They're just a different species to women and sometimes it's hard to remember that isn’t it? As for writing romance - well, the very essence of romance is that the male is not sucky. I tend to avoid the hero coming across like that. Oh sure, he'll make mistakes and come across as an all knowing pain in the bum but he's loveable in that charming, incorrigible way. I believe that's what people want to read - real but flawed characters who eventually get their acts together and admit they love each other. As for these sucky men at Ethel’s workplace with their penises that seem to be annoying her...what can I say? Don’t look. Don’t touch and try to avoid said suckiness. If men suck = annoy - what do they do that annoys you the most? You can tell me – no men read this blog.

Quirky is sexy, like scars or chipped teeth. I also like tattoos - they're rebellious.”
Jennifer Aniston

I have this fascination with tattoos at the moment. I saw this guy today with the most amazing tatt. He let me have a closer look at it. He was very proud of it and it was a beauty. I won’t say where it was or what it looked like as I plan to write it into a book. Anyway, I was never a big fan of tattoos until recently when I wrote Last Man Standing. And, to be honest I really only think they look good on men. There is something that seems so masculine about them. I used to have this neighbor who was a Maori. He had a tattoo that covered his face as per his tradition. His wife told me it frightened a lot of people. I found it quite fascinating. Anyway I expect I'll snap out of that whole tatt phase soon or maybe not…I quite like men with an earring too…

Sexy as socks on a rooster” -- unknown

Want to get people’s attention? Wear bright yellow socks. I had them on today with my Doc Marten Mary Janes and people seem to be riveted by the black and yellow striped socks. I like striped socks. I have quite a collection. But I have found people often stare at them as you cross you legs and your pants leg rises up. To be honest I don’t stare at people’s socks. What's the fascination? Can someone tell me please...or alternatively what do you find yourself staring at and you can’t help yourself?

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?” -- Phyllis Diller

I always go for a walk in my lunch hour just to get out of the office environment. I can’t stand walking from my desk to the lunchroom and then back to my desk. My arse in big enough without adding the extra sitting into the equation. Anyway I was walking along and I came across an unopened pack of condoms – obviously fallen out of a pocket. Boy, someone is probably missing those. It always amuses me the brand name on condoms. Mt Olympus, Apollo, Humongous - ok, I may have made that last one up. But they are always big, beefy, powerful names. These were 'Trojans'. Yes, to be a Trojan is in theory to be strong and enduring -a nice image for any man. However I always think of Trojans allowing the Greeks into Troy in the wooden horse and what a mistake that was. Hmmm…not sure I could take a man with Trojan condoms seriously but when in Rome…or Troy....

"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun."-- Katharine Hepburn

Oh dear…I caused an 'incident' today. I was trying to look at someone’s blog at work and a big red warning sign came up telling me I was naughty and the incident was recorded and something about death and destruction would descend upon me. Excellent…I have always said you cannot have too much death and destruction on a Friday arvo. Anyway, soon someone came out and pointed out the error of my ways. I nodded and tried to look appropriately sorry even thought I was contemplating what to eat for dinner at the same time they were warning me. So, apparently it is now on record that I am bad to the bone. Naturally I am terribly worried - not about the record thing - but I can't decide what to have for dinner...

Please take a squiz at Anny’s blog - she is always most enlightening. Then have a look at Kelly’s to get your perkiness quota filled.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Some people….

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.”-- Albert Einstein

Last Man Standing - review

Last Man Standing is a fantastic follow up to Swift of Heart. This story follows Amy and Alex and their rocky romance. Well, it is rocky because Alex is trying to do things to protect Amy and all they end up doing is making her mad and confused. The author does an incredible job of getting the reader to understand the cultural aspects of this parallel world. Ms. Davies also continues to write stories that have super spunky, take no prisoners, strong women characters who will not be “walked over” for any reason. If you are a fan of strong and smart-mouthed female characters then you won’t want to miss the adventures of the Hart sisters. Last Man Standing is a keeper. Although Last Man Standing is the sequel to Swift of Heart, it can be read alone.
http://www.joyfullyreviewed.com/reviews/Apr08/lastmanstanding.JD.html

Friends, or people you thought of as friends, are funny aren’t they? Even more funny when they want something from you, then have no tact at all and say negative things about you. Don’t get me wrong – I admire people who have the guts to face you in person or in email and tell you how they feel about this or that. Brutal honesty, to me, is good. But on a blog? Then they send an email to me asking for my help? Huh? How terribly, terribly tacky of you and you know who you are. Hmmm…will I help this individual again when they ask for it? Gee, let me think…oh hell no. Friendship swings both ways doesn’t it?

Now that I have dealt with that small matter ….people who live in the past…you know the ones I am talking about. Those who can’t or refuse to get out of say the 80’s or 90’s. I suspect it was their hey-day but how realistic is it to remain there in your speech, dress and writing? Should people move on? Is it healthy to live in the past? Are you denying the present and the future by thinking you are 20 years younger than you are? It’s not like you can ever go back is it? And whatever problems you have in your life now are not going to be solved by trying to act like you are 20 and unaware of the responsibilities and manners of an adult. I believe it’s good to be young at heart and spirit but living in the past and never growing up only worked for Peter Pan and for god sake he runs around in green tights. Unless you think that’s a fashion statement, then you should consider growing up.

Speaking of Peter Pan like people…I read this blog this morning where this man was spruiking on about stuff that I am sure he thinks women like/want to believe and honestly all I could think of was – oh for god sake. You know the type of man I mean. They may be as smooth as a baby’s bum but they are dumb as a box of rocks if they think women fall for the insincere crap they go on with. I used to work with a man like this. He was as charming as but he had no substance. I actually pointed that out to him one day and he just smiled and agreed. “That’s who I am babe and women like it” Ah no, not any women I know…and probably the 6 women he had been married to previously didn’t care for it much either. Blog man? No different…just as see-through but maybe that’s the look he’s going for – if so well done – it worked with me – I saw through it.

Okay so off on another track now….I washed Ida, my car. No, probably not a big deal for most people but in drought water is precious. I used some of the water from my rain tank to do it. It hasn’t rained in a bloody long time and the water, albeit stagnant, I was hoarding was for things that really needed it. The car really needed washing. I believe when people write ‘wash me’ in the dust, when the car no longer looks ruby red and when you brush by it you get covered in dust – you need to wash it. I haven’t washed it in probably a year. The last wash it got was when it got serviced 6 months ago, So, I got the buckets and watering cans out and washed Ida. And naturally, during a drought when water restrictions are at level 6 (not good at all) people do tend to watch what others do with water. I have a sign out the front of my house indicating I have tank water. This is important to have as people have been literally battered or killed in arguments over water usage in this country. We go back to the apes sometimes don’t we? Anyway Ida is now sparkly red and really too nice to drive anywhere for fear of it getting dirty.

I splurged a little and watered some of the plants in the garden with the tank water as well. Sadly many are still dying and I spent a great percentage of today ripping out the dead ones and breaking off or separating pieces of live ones, to put in their place. A once lush garden is very sparse and if it looks good at all it’s all due to the smoke and mirrors technique of making less look more. But there is of course no way I can justifiably complain because they’re just plants and not crops and some countries have been in constant drought for years and crop failure means no food. Sometimes I believe the cosmos gives you lessons like the drought we have now to make us realize how bloody lucky we are – so some plants die and we have dirty cars – we’ve still got food and medicine and we do very well.

Speaking of the cosmos…I am going to the 12th annual Buddha Birthday festival at South Bank in the city – Brisbane for those who don’t know - tomorrow. No, I am not a Buddhist or any religion – I am a – gasp – atheist – no conversion efforts please – the devil doesn’t like people poaching on his preserves. Anyway – I believe be whatever religion or not as you want to be – Christianity, Islam, Jedi. I respect that. I find the legends of most religions interesting. My parents let the Jones kids grow up to believe what they wanted to and we all took radically different paths. So I’ll wander down and have a look at the festival and no doubt buy all sorts of weird existential things as I do. I have 6 Buddha statures in my garden – Mum collected them and I inherited them – so it would probably be like being at home at the festival. What plans for your Sunday?

***************************************

Go check out Anny’s blog to see her standing on a man’s hand. I’m not sure what Kelly is on but I’m fairly sure it’s legal – check ‘em out.

***************************************

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/

Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Challenge me not...

Well…bugger. Author and mate Sandra Cox challenged me to write something on the words below and I never back down from a challenge. I suspect she knows that. Okay the words I have to talk about are…

fisticuffs
oxymoron
dirge
gladsome
risibility

Hmmm…normally Sandra likes me...


Fisticuffs – I am a person that does everything quickly. I talk fast, walk fast and act fast. I am busy, busy, busy and consequently I am still sitting around in my underwear 10 mins before I have to be at work. I then rush around like a mad thing throwing on clothes. I have a habit of not unbuttoning anything. I just slip it over my head etc. I also wear large rings on each finger. They get in the way of everything but I like them. Okay, so I shove the shirt over my head and slide my arms into the sleeves and my hands – my fists, if you will, you caught in the cuffs because the rings snag everything, Now, when you have 5 mins to get to work and it’s 15 mins away and your hands are trapped in your cuffs you ask yourself the following things – when are you going to grow up and dress sensibly? How frigging long does it take you to unbutton something? And why am I wearing the black shirt today when Monday is traditionally assassin black day? So I then have to try and unbutton the cuffs with hands that are trapped inside said sleeves. Houdini has nothing on me.

Oxymoron – Do you seriously wonder about those people who buy oxygen in a bottle or a jar – or worse they go to those oxygen bars or the beauty therapist who charges them an arm and a leg for something that is all around us? Hello? Oxygen is air. We don’t pay for it….yet. I mean, honestly what morons. They get sucked into a fad and believe the stick thin model, who is silicon and botox, flogging the bottle of air. They also believe that they too can look like that if they pay a gazillion dollars for air to breathe or have it blown on their body. Well, someone is certainly blowing something and I believe its smoke. What worries me is that so many people are either so superficial that they believe something so ridiculous is going to make them beautiful or that their self esteem is so low that will believe any load of shinola to be all they can be. Yes, I believe that air is good for you. I totally recommend oxygen for without it you are dead and with the whole dead thing looking young is not an issue. But buying it? You, to me, are an oxymoron.

Dirge – this was actually my day at work today. I get told constantly by the world’s most boring person – okay she’s in a tie for that title – the rules over and over again. Now there are so many that I believe a normal person would not be able to remember them without maybe having them tattooed on their arm or maybe carrying palm cards. But then, she isn’t normal. So, in a dull, monotonous tone she chants the rules over and over again like some monastic dirge that I reckon even monks would freak out at. Most people ears would be bleeding after the 17th recitation. Luckily I have the ability to block out any dirges I don’t want to hear like – don’t run with scissors, make sure you circle the wagons if under attack or don’t sleep in a subway. Of course, that is a problem. I block out boring stuff like work rules and then when I stuff something up I think – oh crap, I’m sure there is a rule about this. What was it? Can I somehow manipulate this stuff up to look less of a stuff up if I can somehow blame it back on the rules? Like don’t use your personal printer on you desk to print stuff off the internet. If caught I’m going to say ‘The temptation was too great not to print and every time you reminded me I shouldn’t print I fixated on that rule and subconsciously and unwillingly I printed 57 sheets of personal crap.’ See? You can dirge me but at your own peril.

Gladsome – I emailed Ethel and told her of this challenge. She said ‘gladsome’ what’s that? Is it a new range of Glad bags? Yes, I believe so Ethel. Someone wants me to talk about plastic bags (Glad – product name.) There is also Glad wrap – it’s like cling wrap…cling film. Very handy stuff but it pisses me off no end when you cannot find the start of the cling wrap and you have to spin the plastic roll around and around, scraping your finger nail over it to find the beginning but you can’t because you never can when you are busy can you? Or the newspaper man rolls the Sunday newspaper in cling film and I can never get the paper out without cutting into a hunk of it. I asked him why he persists in tormenting me like this. His response – I must have some fun in life…so gladsome is when people like to torment you will cling film…or not…it’s all relative.

Risibility…I could have looked this word up but I believe the Amarinda definition is when you drink Riesling or really any white wine and you become very deep and philosophical about life. Ever noticed how meaningful one can be when then have had a glass or 7 of plonk? Not me of course – I am way too pure-ish. The risibility of the Riesling just rises to the top and all sorts of profound things are said like – Where are my shoes? Mr waiter-man, I believe I love you and will be yours forever if you bring forth more wine. Wine, women and song – I am drinking wine, I am a woman, now hear me sing – no I don’t need shoes to sing in. Let ‘em eat cake – pass me the chips. I remember being in a bar in Pocatello and singing Gloria Gaynor’s ‘I will survive’- a classic risibility song - with a bunch of Aussies – we sang it at least 12 times…very badly but had a bloody good time. I was under the influence of risibility and therefore cannot be blamed for my actions.

Now… author Ashley Ladd tagged me again for a meme. I loathe memes…there are a bunch of rules you have to follow but basically you give 6 random facts about yourself. You also have to tag 6 other people to annoy the crap out of. Fine…whatever…I‘ll do it now so it’s out there and over and done with.

1. I consider myself fantastic
2. I know some excellent writers and they happen to write e-books…but then the best people do
3. I cannot sing worth a damn but I sing at the top of my lungs when I do
4. I believe the impossible is possible – you just have to be pushy
5. I consider being able to do the Vulcan hand salute a real talent
6. I believe Australia, particularly Queensland, is the best damn place in the world.

Okay…I’m tagging

- Hilary Clinton
- Dalai Lama
- George Clooney
- Ronald McDonald
- Hugh Jackman
- The model from the cover of Last Man Standing

Can hardly wait to see what they come up with…not like they won’t do it…I’ve tagged them...they must...there is some half arsed rule about it.

Anny and Kelly are doing Anny and Kelly things…go read, seek, find, be.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Worms on a Saturday....

Quote for today –
“You’re writing sex and I’m putting the Christmas tree up…where have I gone wrong in my life?” - good friend, Katie

Maid For Death – review

A ghost, a hunter and anonymous sex are only a couple of reasons I found this Halloween morsel just right for a star filled autumn evening. Maid for Death was another example of why Amarinda Jones is fast becoming a force to be reckoned with. Her ability to design characters with a sense of humor, a bit of sass and tons of raging lust has ensured her latest quickie is just the right sized treat for the erotic reader. Cassandra and Sebastian’s banter left me with a permanent smile, taking your everyday individual in an out of this world situation and making it seems as if it happens daily. Even without the wow factors this story had a plot that was captivating from go. Ms. Jones is definitely earning herself a spot on my must have list. Can’t wait to see what delicious treat she has in store for us next.
http://www.fallenangelreviews.com/2007/November/Rachelle-TricksAndTreats_MaidForDeath.htm Thanks Rachelle


Did you know…

….that worms do not like onions or citrus peel? How do I know? Well I went and bought 3,000 worms today. Why? They’re delicious on toast. Okay, that’s a lie. I prefer them without toast. But seriously, I bought the little buggers as they are very good if you have a compost bin. Yep, I have one of them. Vegetable scraps and paper go in and fabulous rich dirt comes out. That’s about as close to Mother Nature as I get. Though I did talk a big spider off the clothesline this morning. He wasn’t about to move and make way for clothes so I had to bring in the big guns – a mop – and persuade him down. I don’t think he was particularly grateful for me not killing him as I’m sure I heard him mutter ‘home wrecking bitch’ as he scrambled away. That was my good deed today for Mother Nature.

Anyway, back to worms. They are very good in compost bins for breaking up matter. The problem is they are finicky eaters. The box they come in lists the things they will and will not eat. The first lot of worms I bought two months ago all escaped. How do I know? Well I would see then slithering down the outside of the bin trying to get away. Why? Because me being me, ignored the instructions on the side of the box regarding what worms ate. Okay, to be honest, I did glance at it and decided I was not about to be dictated to by worms about what they would eat. I would have gotten married if I wanted to do that. So I just chucked them in and proceeded to dump scraps, including lemon and onions, on them. That’s when they started to execute the great escape. One by one they fled until none were left. Ungrateful little buggers. The man at the local garden centre was appalled that I did not treat them correctly and I received a lecture on the ‘care and maintenance of worms.’ Fascinating (not). If it comes out on DVD make sure you get it.

Anyway, the new lot is in the compost bin. There has been no escape attempt mounted yet. I will be good and refrain from chucking in things worms do not eat. Yes, this is what my life has come down to – dealing with finicky worms. No different to work really.

Tell me…what is the fascination of worms in bottles of Tequila? Never understood it or why you would want to eat the worm, other than you are pissed to the gills, after drinking the Tequila. Please explain someone…Anny – you’ve done it all – what’s the word on worm eating? And for Kelly, please refer below, something of a religious nature to let you know I am not a complete heathen.


A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon.Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.
At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:The first worm in alcohol - Dead. The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead. Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead. Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.
So the Minister asked the congregation - What can you learn from this demonstration?A little old woman in the back quickly raised her hand and said, "As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't have worms!"

So there it is…I cannot agree with the smoking bit, but clearly alcohol and chocolate are good for you. Speaking of good things…go check at www.annycook.blogspot.com for a cute picture of Anny. She’s not blue. Amazing, Grace. What is the all-singing, all-dancing Kelly doing on www.kkirch.blogspot.com? I have no idea but I am sure it will be dazzling, informative whilst making you wonder about her sanity.


Last Man Standing - reviews

I highly enjoyed this story. There is nothing bad to be said about Last Man Standing. Alex is a scarred, battle hardened, warrior who isn’t looking for happily ever after. He’s honest and everything he does is for a reason, he is not one to play around for the fun of it. Amy is strong and independent. She knows how to take care of herself, and she does it in a smart way. The chemistry between these two is hard to miss, and their scenes together flowed in the perfect way. Janet Davies has written another great story with Last Man Standing. With great supporting characters, this story was spot on all the way through. I would love to learn more about the world she has created.

http://www.fallenangelreviews.com/2007/November/Ashley-LastManStanding.htm

Much appreciated Ashley

I loved it the whole story for it had it all. There was suspense, fighting and the truth behind Alex’s past history. All in all it was great and definitely rated a top 5 and can’t wait for more from this talented author.

http://www.nightowlromance.com/nightowlromance/reviews/Review.asp?ReviewId=988
Thanks Tammie

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

The first cockroach of summer…

I just discovered the first mutant, big arsed cockroach of summer. These big buggers fly in open windows all summer long in sub tropical Brisbane. Normal pest control does not kill them. They are like the kamikaze of the bug world. They fly in, annoy the hell our of you and then die as you drown them in bug spray. I don’t know if they are just stupid or cunning. Summer officially starts 1st December in Oz. looks like they’re early…annoying bastards.

I am back from the wilds of the country. I survived. I am not a country person. While I love Australia from the desert to the sea, I need to live in the city. I need cement under my feet and the comfort of neon signs. I can look at country type scenery for so long – that’s a cow, a tractor, a wheat field…where’s the shopping centre? Am I shallow? Possibly. I think it’s just more that I know where I am comfortable. I insist on mod cons. I like to be able to get in the car and in ten minutes flat be home with a take away and a bottle of plonk in my hand. I like having the post office, ATM and supermarket four streets away. I am Amarinda of the City.

I am displaying some fine bruises on my knees and elbows. Too much praying your ask? Um, no. Something wildly exciting that required me to be in that position like…um, being on the floor arse up and – er - scrubbing? Nah. I fell out of bed. Last night I had to sleep in a single bed. I cannot sleep in single beds. I am a very messy sleeper. A male, now acquaintance, once called me a ‘human thrashing machine’ to sleep with. Hmmm…some men just chicken out easily I believe and therefore they sleep alone. Anyway, I probably can kill when I am asleep as I do roll, and thrash and apparently punch in my sleep. When you try to do all that in a single bed you naturally fall out.

Kelly Kirch…I shake my head at you Grasshopper. You would have noticed her half arsed map of the world on her blog www.kkirch.blogspot.com yesterday? She cut Australia in two!!! I am in the process of making her feel real bad about that – it’s the least a friend can do. I have supplied two maps for my blog today. One of Australia and one of the most important part of Australia – Queensland. No, I am not parochial, I just know where the best places are.

Wise, zen-like Anny Cook is making us all jealous on www.annycook.blogspot.com with her blog. Her husband cleans!!! I don’t want a husband but a man who cleans and maybe leaves a fabulously cooked meal in the microwave just before he leaves to go to the Bat Cave for the evening would be excellent in my eyes.

Mysterious, brooding, chef wanted to clean, cook and piss off once everything is done…yes, that would work

The eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month
November is poppy month, the time of the year when we wear ared poppy in memory of those who laid down their lives for our sakes.

Remember to wear your poppy with pride.

Total-e-Bound’s profits from Camouflaged Hearts will be going to Forces Benevolent Funds to support and help those families who have lost their husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, sons and daughters, in the recent conflicts. So buy the book and support a good cause. Not only that you will get to read some fantastic stories. See? Feel good spiritually and have some great Sunday reading. Click on the cover and buy the book.




Last Man Standing review - click on the cover to buy

Here’s another fantastic, page-turning story. I loved the first book, Swift of Heart and found Last Man Standing came with the same high quality. The plot moves along well and the storyline is so intriguing it hooks you right into it. Even though this is a sequel, I think a first time reader will be able to follow what has happened without a problem. A fascinating look at parallel dimensions and the problems of jealousy and greed that are found in any dimension.

http://www.onceuponaromance.net/LastManStandingReview.htm

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Friday - thank whomever it is over

Last Man Standing – review….see, I can be sweet…

OH MY!! LAST MAN STANDING was as well-timed and impressive a plot as today’s newspaper main attraction. The thin ribbon of suspense helped to formulate a great surprise ending. And, what a surprise ending! I didn’t see it coming! It hit me like a ton of bricks.

Janet Davies has a unique talent for crafting dialogue and creating characters with genuine conscience about today's problems that I like reading about. Alex could charm my socks off with his wonderful conversation any time. Amy not only had humor but coolness under fire that will surely have readers anticipating her next move. So sweet yet, all it took was one small incident to conceive an acceptable relationship so hot between two beautiful people that this reader could never overlook. Relish in it -- I did. .

Thanks to Wanda at Romance Studio

Friday – hallelujah and pass the gin!

Today at work….

- the server was not working so no work could be done. Damn shame that. I advocated immediately going home. This was met with “be serious Amarinda.” I was - deadly serious…see how boring these men are?
- watched headless chook procession as they ran around trying to work out what was wrong with server. I waited an hour then suggested they ring the IT guys who looked after the server. They did and it was fixed in minutes…fancy that
- two hours later big electrical bang and orange flash – men rushed into to play with live power. I suggested that it might be an idea if they turn power off before playing with it. Men not electrocuted. I went back to writing my book as for some reason word not affected…excellent.
- 1 hour later computer back on
- 30 minutes later computers back off
- On
- Off – you get the picture – this happened all day long…
- Got emergency email from Ethel – “help me cheat”. Let me explain. Ethel and I cheat if it suits our purposes…yes, shocking, I know. However a year or more ago, I did a test with an employment agency. They emailed me the results. Whenever Ethel and I have been asked for employment test results we have been ‘adjusting’ these results ever since. I discovered how to do it and now if a job asks us if we have previous test results we bodgie the ones I have accordingly. I am very good at it. Ethel sucks at it. So she sent ‘our test results’ to me and said ‘make me look good' To do this I need to know what job she is going for and manipulate the results accordingly. I expect one day I will feel bad about it but until then, I will manipulate results as requested.
- I work with musicians in my job. One rang me – very drunk and told me he loved me. I said 'you are legless.' He said yes and ‘anyone can have me.’ I said “Mick who wants you mate?” That’s when he said he loved me as I always ‘tell him off’ when he is ‘acting like a dipstick.’ That’s my job.
- Next Monday and Tuesday I am sick…how do I know? It’s just a psychic feeling I have…

On www.kkirch.blogspot.com... Kelly left us with…..

Ethelred, leapt forward to save Zoltan, trying just this once to be Ethelred the Ready. Instead he tripped on his feet. His arms flailed. His palm shoved the fine edge of the blade inward, bisecting Zoltan's adam's apple in two. Zoltan crumpled to the floor on top of the apologetic king.

"Well, crap. There goes another husband." Emmeline gave a few moments to consider, then shrugged and wiped the blade on her braes. "Look, king, I don't have time to waste with a burial, so how 'bout you tidy up this mess you made."

"Aye warrioress. But what of this?" He pointed to Zoltan's turban. "It is of fine making and wouldst be a treasured weave for my favored concubine."

"Sure, take it." Stepping over Zoltan's limp form, Emmeline unlatched his amulet necklace. She gave it a rub. Three times counter clockwise, twice clockwise, and a series of taps she'd seen Zoltan use before. A vortex opened before her. Ever confident, she strode into the beckoning light.

Hmmm, Zoltan, my creation dead? I think not…

…and crashed face first into an invisible force field. “Bugger.” Emmeline swore as her nose took the impact of the sudden rock hard barrier. She stiffened as she felt movement behind her.

“Emmie, Emmie, Emmie,” Zoltan’s growled softly.

“What? What? What?” She turned to look at her husband. The gash on his neck, that would have killed a normal man, was but a paper cut to Zoltan. “This being immortal thing of yours is quite annoying at times.”

“I know.” Zoltan smiled as he jumped up. “I like pissing you off.” He reached for her hand. “Let’s get out of here wife of mine.”

Emmeline sighed tiredly. She knew the only way to kill Zoltan was to kill herself. They were linked by a common bond. “Can’t you just leave me be?”

“That would be no fun for me.” He pulled her to him and uttered the magic words. “Bingo, bango, bongo, I wish to visit the Congo.”

“Not the frigging Congo again,” Emmeline wailed as she was locked in Zoltan’s arms as they spun through time. When they finally stopped spinning, they landed in a heap. “Crap! It’s freezing!”

“This is not the Congo.” Zoltan looked around at the massed blue-white ice. “We’re in the Artic.”

“Oh way to go wizard boy.” Emmeline scrambled to her feet and wrapped her arms around her body as she shivered.

Suddenly a deep, howling reverberated off the ice.

“Uh oh,” Zoltan murmured, looking around warily.

“Uh oh doesn’t sound good.”

“It’s not. We’re in deep trouble. That’s a yowie and it wants blood.”

Oh dear, oh dear? What is a Yowie? Is it a figment of my imagination or an Aussie beastie? Whatever will Anny do with it? Give it a nipple ring? Check out www.annycook.blogspot.com tomorrow for the next riveting episode. Kelly has multi-talented author Sandra Cox on www.kkirch.blogspot.com. And, as always the writer blogs to the left are ones that I read on a regular basis as these writers dazzle, amaze and intrigue me. Okay, that’s enough sucking up.

There will be no blog Saturday as I venture west into the – gasp – country. I am a city girl at heart so heading west will probably give me a nose bleed and an arm cramp but it’s one of things that must be done. I will be back Sunday to waffle on as usual.

Freedom – what does it mean to you? Please read the message below from Claire Siemaszkiewicz Managing Director Total-e-Bound Publishing - and remember freedom has a price.

The eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month
November is poppy month, the time of the year when we wear a red poppy in memory of those who laid
down their lives for our sakes.

As Remembrance Sunday approaches, to pay tribute to our brave soldiers and those they’ve left behind, Total-e-Bound release our tribute anthology.

Total-e-bound wanted to do something to show our own real brave warriors—who fight to defend us and their countries every day—just how much their bravery means to us.

Being an ex-army wife myself, and having been brought up with the forces as a child, I know what it’s like for the families when the soldiers go off to war. The pain, emotion and worry those families endure, never knowing if their loved ones will come home.

I also know of their strength and courage in the face of adversity, and I know just how much the forces wives band together to create a solid and structured support network for each other, the likes of which you just don’t get in civilian life. But for sadly far too many, the pain and hardship goes on way beyond the scope of support networks and memorial parades, news reports and flag waving. As the years pass and the world moves on—news reports become historical texts. Memories fade for many but for some the pain is silent and deep, very real and enduring.

A forces life is not an easy one for the families waiting back home, but they are the backbone—the glue that holds it all together.

So for this anthology, we wanted to give something back. Give something to the wives and families who endure and who have loved and lost.

Total-e-Bound’s profits from this anthology will be going to Forces Benevolent Funds to support and help those families who have lost their husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, sons and daughters, in the recent conflicts.

Remember to wear your poppy with pride.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?

Sunday stuff...

So, I was talking on line to my blog partners Kelly and Anny about what to write for a blog. I was going to rabbit on as normal about Sunday stuff but Kelly suggested the following items to discuss, I am sure as a throw away thing, but what the hell…

Toys – well, we all know Christmas is coming. One year many moons ago, I worked as a causal staffer in a major retail store. I was part of what they called ‘the flying squad.’ This was a bunch of staff members who could work in any department as they were greedy for money and so full of bull they could sell anything to anyone. Though, I personally think I was there due to my charm. Anyway, one Christmas I was called in to work in the toy department on the day Santa Claus made his grand entrance to the store. OMG – what a frenzy! Feral children everywhere, parents pushing and shoving to get the latest toy for their ankle biters and the staff members having to at one stage sit of the counters to avoid being crushed. Yes, the true spirit of Christmas.

The purpose of the cock ring – to be honest I have never seen a cock wear a ring. Where exactly would it go? Roosters as far as I understand have talon feet so am wondering how effectively a ring would stay on one of those talons when they are scratching around in the barnyard. And is it just the cocks or do the hens wear rings? It’s certainly an intriguing question.

Collection of the oddest jobs (like the person who as to name the colors in a carpet sample) - Never had to name colour samples though I am sure I would be good at that – Pukeable brown, vomitose orange, regrettable lime. Never had any odd jobs. I did once get offered a waitress job where at the end of the interview he said “You wouldn’t have any objection to being topless would you?” I said “No, not as long as you don’t mind having your testicles cut off and stapled to your ears.” He had an issue with this and no, I did not get the job.


The benefits of yogurt – I love and adore low fat cheesecake yogurt. The benefits? Well, I like the taste and all the active bacteria within is supposed to be good for your gizzards – though have you ever noticed when they announce things like “Red wine is good for you” two months later after you have been sculling red wine they then announce “red wine is bad for you.” They do it all the time – “eat chocolate, but don’t”, “coffee is good but you will die if you keep drinking it.” Frigging hell. My theory is we are all going to die. If you are happy doing what you are doing then what the hell

Postulating on the benefits of living in a tree. I love trees. I have a ginormous melaleuca tree in my backyard. It’s the tea tree with the papery bark. Beautiful tree. When I was traveling in the US many moons ago, we were all dragged out very, very early one morning to see the world’s biggest sequoia tree at Yosemite. I can tell you a bunch of hung-over Aussies who cannot see clearly at 4am in the morning aren’t impressed by a tree. We all looked at it and went – uh huh, that it? I, of course, get the significance now, though still not at 4am in the morning after a hike.

If Nessy really ever existed – sure, why not? I exist, you exist, why can’t a big-arsed swimming dinosaur be swimming around Loch Ness? I went to Loch Ness and took the obligatory photos. I saw nothing but that does not mean Nessy is not swimming around doing his or her thing. Let Nessy be. If he wants to be found he will.

Sunday….
- writing the next book – sex, romance, opposites attracting despite loathing each other.
- broke the diet – because I could and I am blaming author Barbara Huffert for putting the idea of ice-cream into my mind. I am too pure to have thought of it myself.
- mowed the lawn because the mowing pixies do not come when I summon them – little bastards
- walked around in shorts and a bra all day as hot and steamy – the weather not me…though sometimes...
- Discussed boobs, contests, caves, psychology, men, public sex, frogs - amongst other things with Anny and Kelly

As you know, the blog serial taxes our brains so we rest them on Sunday. However on www.annycook.blogspot.com, Anny as always will fascinate and intrigue you while Kelly on www.kkirch.blogspot.com will have you wondering about her sanity…I mean her wisdom. Visit their blogs and please write cryptic comments in made up names.

www.freewebs.com/amarindajones/
Go ahead: Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?